Forgiveness: A Christian Virtue
Key Points
This sermon focuses on the theme of forgiveness, building on a previous message. The main point is that forgiveness is a conscious decision and a mandatory Christian virtue, while forgetting and reconciliation are not.
Key Points on Forgiveness
- Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling. It's a choice to release someone from the wrong they've done against you, regardless of whether they ask for an apology.
- Forgiveness and forgetting are two different things. While God chooses not to hold our sins against us, we, as humans, may not be able to completely forget a hurtful event. The key is to forgive anyway, even if the memory remains.
- Forgiveness is not the same as restitution or reconciliation. Reconciliation requires a change in attitude, actions, and behavior from the offender to restore the relationship. Forgiveness is a one-way act of the heart.
- Forgiveness releases both the offender and the offended. By choosing to forgive, you free yourself from the pain of bitterness, resentment, and anger, which can negatively impact your mental, physical, and spiritual health.
- Forgiveness does not mean excusing or condoning bad behavior. You can forgive someone while still acknowledging the harm that was done. It doesn't mean you have to be best friends again, overlook abuse, or refuse to press charges if a crime has been committed.
- God's forgiveness is our model. The Bible repeatedly points to Jesus's example of forgiveness, particularly his words on the cross, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." This shows us that forgiveness is possible even when we have been deeply wronged.
What Forgiveness is NOT
The sermon clarifies several common misconceptions about forgiveness:- It does not mean approving of what someone did.
- It does not mean pretending evil never took place.
- It does not mean making excuses for bad behavior.
- It does not mean overlooking abuse.
- It does not mean letting people "walk all over you."
- It does not mean you have to restore the relationship to what it was before.
- It does not mean you must tell the person you have forgiven them.
- It does not mean forgetting the wrong that was done.
Forgiveness vs. Bitterness and Resentment
- Bitterness is a feeling of deep anger and disappointment.
- Resentment is a feeling of anger that comes from being forced to accept something you don't want to. It leads to health issues, damaged relationships, and withdrawal.
- The speaker emphasizes that bitterness and resentment are destructive and that a believer's choice to forgive is a choice to let go of these destructive emotions.
The Example of Joseph and the Amish Community
- Joseph was wronged by his brothers, Potiphar's wife, and those he helped in prison. He chose not to be resentful, but rather to see how God turned the evil done to him into good. He didn't say, "I forgive you," but his actions showed he had released them from the wrong they had done.
- The Amish community demonstrated radical forgiveness in 2006 when a man shot and killed five of their young girls. They attended his funeral, offered support to his grieving widow, and chose to love and forgive rather than seek revenge.